Someone once told me that TRUST is more important THAN LOVE, she told me LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH. At the time I wasn’t trustworthy, but I LOVED. My heart was divided into many HEARTS OF VARIOUS SIZES. In this state of A BROKEN HEART, I started to break the pieces down until I had HEART DUST left, nothing meant anything anymore. When my heart first broke, I started to use substances to blind myself from facing myself. Nothing worked but numbing substances came as close and was center of my hearts broken galaxy. 3rd TIME I was DEAD and brought back to life, I woke on the hospital bed, blood pressure 40/14, my right leg was paralyzed, I was DEAF, woman walking around the bed, baby with her, everything was slow motion, DR was writing on the cardboard “DO YOU DO HEROINE”. I nodded yes so devoid of any emotion, after all my heart was dust at this point. Something within me at that moment decided that I can’t take it any more, I’M READY TO GO, I’M BROKEN, I’M HEARTLESS AND THE WORLD IS BETTER OFF WITHOUT ME. I closed my eyes and something grabbed my attention violently, hard to describe this, it’s as if the very air that surrounds me just grabbed my insides. It said ” YOU INSOLENT FUCK, YOU THINK IT’S ON YOU TO SAY WHEN IT’S YOUR TIME TO GO”. In that instance my Heart was made whole again. I wasn’t fortunate, NO that’s to easy, I wasn’t LUCKY either, that’s also a way out. A way out of of RESPONSIBILITY. She was wrong ABOUT Love though, LOVE IS ABOVE ALL ELSE, NOT ONLY IS IT ENOUGH IT IS THE ONLY THING IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD THAT JUST IS. UNCHANGING, INFINITE, THE ONLY THING THAT WILL NEVER LEAVE YOUR SIDE. Now I LOVE WHOLEHEARTEDLY but my closest don’t TRUST ME. MY HEART will never be broken again, yet only a whole heart gets the full brunt OF SADNESS, most people pity, a whole heart weeps and aches and feels Sadness for what it is. In this brief existence, in this speck of dust that is my LIFE, I HAVE LOVE and when the shell breaks, TO ABSOLUTE LOVE I SHALL RETURN. WITHOUT TRUST, one is only entertaining THE IDEA OF LOVE.